I listened to a dialogue with Byron Katie this morning where she asked the audience how many believe all is good? and then how many believe all is God?

Answering those questions for myself, I see that there is a clear yes to the second question, but not so clear an answer to the first. In looking at the world, and my experiences (as a human being, and also realizing that all is God) what came up is God is crazy (!).

God is crazy.

1. Yes (That was what came up for me first when I looked at it. I see that I cannot take it as a conscious worldview, that it is just meant for fun, but also see that it does reflect a more serious belief in me.)
   
   
2. No (Cannot know that is true. Also cannot know what is best of all ours paths.)
   
   
3. What happens when I believe that thought?
   
   Sense of amusement. Seeing the craziness of the world - that it is all God, yet most don't realize it and create huge amounts of (apparent) troubles for themselves through that. Seeing the suffering, yet how that too is part of the game. Seeing the delusion, and how that too is God exploring itself, this time through suffering. It is pretty crazy.
   
   I also notice a certain confusion coming up when I attach to that statement. Confusion, bevilderment, sense of being lost. Sense of separation from myself, others, life, God.
   
   The statement is both amusing, and also confusing. I can see how it is just a story, just another overlay and filter. Just another projection. It gives some relief if taken lightly, but is confusing if taken more seriously.
   
   
4. Who would I be without that belief?
   
   OK with what is, free from this layer of interpretation. Clear. Sense of intimacy with myself, others, life, God.
   
   
5. (a) I am crazy.
   
   Yes, that is probably more true. I am crazy when I think God is crazy, because I attach to an abstract overlay on what is. Whenever I believe in any abstraction, I am crazy. And that is OK too.
   
   (b) God is not crazy.
   
   No, what is, is. Crazy is just another interpretation, another story.
   
   (c) My thougths are crazy.
   
   Yes, when I believe in them. They create craziness when believed in.
   
   (d) My thoughts are not crazy.
   
   No, they are just doing their job, innocently. It is only the belief in them which makes it appear crazy. Which creates a sense of separation and suffering.
   
   
6. I look forward to seeing God as crazy.
   
   Yes, because it is a reminder of how I am patently crazy when I believe in abstractions.
   

Labels: own inquiry