Here are the energy sketches I have posted in the past, each one reflecting either what is really going on energetically (don't know since I don't have anyone apart from myself to check it) or at least what is going on psychologically.



This one is from some years back, towards the end of the initial awakening (started in my teens and lasted for about ten years.) It reflects the intensity of that period, and the head centered awakening of emptiness and luminosity. Everything, including the physical body, was experienced as emptiness and luminosity during this phase. There is also a circle around the body (a mandorla), which may reflect the intensity of the reorganization of my human self that took place during that time. It may also reflect a remaining sense of I at some levels (not that mandorlas necessarily or even typically reflect that, that is just my sense in this particular case.)

What strikes me the most, looking at it now, is the burning intensity here. I was on fire during this period, in every way. Very ambitious, engaged in a large number of passions, even the nights were intense - with an experience of intense reorganization and work on my human self. I didn't know how to turn it off (and then it happened on its own, during the following dark night phase.)




Here is another one from the same time. Notice how the above/below is relatively symmetrical and uniform, with with some indications of roots going down (but also up).

I didn't do any drawings at all during the dark night phase, which happened a couple of years later. (Or any spiritual practices at all, apart from community engagement.)




This one is from six months ago, at the tail end of the dark night phase (which lasted for some years and is still not quite over), and a little more than half a year into the diksha process. There is still an above/below symmetry, reflecting a head centered awakening of emptiness and luminosity. There are also roots going down, but they seem a little precarious to me now.



This is from last week, after the enlovenment diksha and just before a conscious awareness of the shift into endarkenment and early belly awakening. There is much more above/below differentiation, and more fluid fullness and richness below. There is still the reflections of the head centered awakening above, emptiness and luminosity. And there is also a sphere over the head, which I remember from drawings I made while still in Norway which I don't have here (some years before the initial one posted above). The sphere in this one is more expanded and alive compared to the small one six months earlier.



This is one or two days after the conscious shift into endarkenment, with above/below differentiation and more spheres above the head, probably representing chakras/energy centers outside of the physical body. (The yellow and red around the body is a little more muddy than seems right.)



And this one, one or two days after the colorful one. Simple, with clear above/below differentiation. Below, I see that in the drawing from six months ago, there are roots. The ones immediately after the endarkenment diksha have smooth flowing lines and roots. And this one has only the smooth flowing lines.

Labels: currently, energy