Inquiry :: Life is a Burden
Life is a burden.
- Yes (Feels true, to a certain extent. The sense of it being a burden shows up as a background atmosphere in my life.)
- No (Cannot know that is absolutely true.)
- How do I react when I believe that thought?
I notice a background atmosphere of feeling life as a burden. I feel hopeless. Trapped. No way out. Even when there is no obvious reason for it, there is an overlay of feeling life as a burden. It always stays in the background.
How do I treat myself when I have that thought?
I don't allow myself to not feel that life is a burden. I feel slightly depressed. Hopeless. I don't engage as much as I would otherwise.
How do I treat others?
I seek out others who see life as a burden.
When did the thought come up first?
I see how my birth family see stoicism as a value, and the same for my culture (life is a burden, but I can endure). My birth family see life as a burden, so I naturally picked it up - innocently. I also see that I think I should see life as a burden, because they do.
What is the payoff from holding onto that belief?
I get to be a martyr. To be stoic. To endure. To be a good person, stoic in the face of a life of burden. I get to fit in with others who see life as a burden. - Who would I be without that belief?
I would see life more as it is, without the overlay of the story of it being a burden. I would allow myself to not have the atmosphere of burden even when there is no obvious reason for it. And I don't have to see situations that may appear difficult as a burden either. I can remove the whole layer of seeing life as a burden. I am free from carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders, independent of how it shows up. - (a) Life is not a burden.
Yes, that is more true. Life is just what it is, and the burden only comes through my story of life as a burden.
(b) My thinking is a burden.
Yes, that is also more true. My thinking is a burden to me, especially when I think that life is a burden. Or more accuretely when I believe in the thought that life is a burden.
(c) My thinking is not a burden.
That is true as well. My thinking is innocent. If there is no belief in thoughts, they are just neutral - just like anything else, like clouds, coming and going. Inherently free from any sting.
(d) I am a burden to myself.
Yes, that is true as well. The burden comes from me seeing life as a burden.
(e) I am not a burden to myself.
Also true. I am not a burden to myself. Only the belief in the story that life is a burden creates the sense of a burden. Just a simple belief.
(f) Others are a burden to me.
Yes, they are when I believe I need to see life as a burden, just because they do.
(g) Others are not a burden to me.
Yes, also true. I am the one believing that I need to see life as a burden, if they do.
(h) I am a burden to others.
Yes, when I live my life from the story that it is a burden.
(i) I am not a burden to others.
That is right, too. I have my stories. They have theirs. If they don't have a story of me (or life) as a burden, then there is no burden there. They are free from it.
Labels: own inquiry