Desperately Seeking the Nondual
Over the last few days, I have noticed a sense of urgency around arriving at a stable nondual awakening. What is, still somewhat identified with/as a separate "I", seeks to realize itself as it is - with no "I" anywhere.
One the one hand, I know that this sense of urgency often goes before a nondual awakening. On the other hand, I also know that it comes out of exactly what prevents the nondual realization - a belief in the thought "I".
I need to arrive at a nondual awakening.
- Yes, seems true.
- No, an opinion.
- Sense of urgency. Going back in memory to past nondual glimpses, trying to recreate the realization or what (apparently) led up to the realization. Obsessed. Pushing ahead.
- Clear. Spacious. Present. OK with what is. Seeing more clearly.
- (a) I don't need to arrive at a nondual awakening. (Yes, since it hasn't "popped" yet, it is obviously not needed yet.)
(b) My thoughts need to arrive at a nondual awakening. (Yes, that is the only way they can be liberated - in the context of a nondual awakening.)